Saturday, February 13, 2010

How to combat bitterness in life

Have you been at a time felt bitter in life? I know this is quite a direct and bold question; however, it takes so much to feel bitterness in life. It could be caused by a thankless or poorly compensated job, a one-sided relationship, an unhealthy environment, an uncaring and unprotective home or the like. This bitterness can cause sorrow and depression. It makes a person dwell only on the negatives and it is a battle so difficult to endure that without a sign of hope, can cause a person to end his life.

Take a look at some famous suicide stories. We had Daul Kim, a famous Korean model whose achievements at the age of twenty is something every other girl envies. Very recently, we had Lee Alexander McQueen end his life because of unhappiness. These people had money, fame and success. But they had been bitter and that bitterness won over them.

If you feel that you are unhappy and that unhappiness is staying with you for sometime, evaluate yourself. Why are you unhappy? What are the results of your unhappiness? What are the things that can make you happy? How can you get out from this unhappiness? Who can help you out from this unhappiness?

It is very important to understand why you are unhappy because until you come to terms the reasons, only then you would know where and how to start to combat them.

Due to your unhappiness, what other areas in life are affected? Are you bitter with your job? Is your relationship with your boyfriend or spouse affected by this bitterness? Is the unhappiness brought by your unhealthy job is worth over your relationship?

If not, you might as well change your job. Or if not, then you would have to work on other aspects that can help change the course of your job. These are the examples of identifying the ways to get out from your unhappiness. If it is a relationship that burdens you, which I know is very complicated, you can start reading relationship tools from some experts that can guide you through. Or discuss it with your partner if both of you need help from an expert. Whatever the situation, there has to be a way out that you have to figure whether it is quitting your job and looking for another well-compensated or well-acknowledged occupation or quitting the relationship and looking for someone’s better. There has to be a way out other than suicide!

Who can help you out? Oftentimes the battle is too much to handle by ourselves. You have to ask for help. Express what you feel to whoever you can trust. It would be better if you can speak with your parents, or your siblings or you best friend. However, my message for this part goes more to the other parties. If you know someone who is unhappy, be selfless enough to lend your time and help. Some people jokingly talk about suicide and we take it as a joke, but it should never be taken lightly. A talk about ending one’s life is always and is always a cry for help. Look at Daul Kim, she had been crying out for help through her blog, a blog that I actually met after her death, but her fans, oh so many of them who claim to read her words religiously every day, never heard her. She had been crying out for help. People always hear the cry not until it’s too late. However, if you feel that nobody around can be trusted or can understand you, there is always One faithful friend Who is always ready to hear and to help you. Speak to Him in prayer.

And if it’s you who is unhappy, try to google the beautiful words of Desiderata.
If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain or bitter; for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself…

No matter how hard the situation can be, there are always people lesser than you. Think of them that are hit by worse catastrophes, who are battling for their lives amidst famine and dehydration, they would make you appreciate your life.


  1. Hello! Oh wow, what a perfect article filled with so much advice and words of wisdom. It's so hard to imagine what must be going on in peoples minds when they look so cool on the surface.

    Thank you for your lovely comment, I've got a competition on at the moment to say a huge thank you to lovely readers like yourself!

    Happy VDay xoxo

  2. Gosh have so said it all. At the end of the day if you can not be happy with who you are and for the fact that you are a true gift of life....then you seriously are looking down the wrong road or reading the wrong book.

    We are all chosen as unique human beings...each different in strengths and that we are all number 1.

    Allowing our minds to be consumed by hurt, sadness or self-disappointment is truly our own choice.

    Yes we have those down days...but there is a reason for without them how would we ever truly appreciate the up days!

  3. Those are the exact words D!, the down days are there to make us appreciate the good days. Such a wisdom, you are right. We cannot enjoy the sweetness of food without the bitter one. :)

  4. This is a great post. Yes, I agree with D that being unhappy is our own choice. If we can't change things or situations such as a working system the way we want it to be, let's change our attitude or the way we look at things. Learning to bend is one way out from unhappiness. Committing suicide is only for those who care for no one including themselves.

  5. I've totally felt this way and have been dealing w/ bitterness towards my job for 18 months now. I am really unhappy and have been looking for a new one for over a year. Since the econ sucks, i haven't found a job to leave yet. It's so hard to not let it interfere with other parts of my life but I'm really try to keep it separate. :/

    Thanks for following my blog :)

  6. such a good post! i especially love blogs with a point of view (: thanks for finding me and commenting! xo

  7. We had a rough year last year and I had to consciously make an effort to try to let go of the nasty things that had happened and focus on the new year and positive things that I know are ahead!

  8. Great post Gleen... and you are right, there are a lot of less fortunate people out there.

    I am always be happy and contented with what I have. That's why you see me always smiling...and that is genuine smile. xoxo

  9. Thanks a lot darling. This is such a helpful and wonderful post :) I'm following you!

  10. This all rings so true to me. Your last two sentences were very nice. Something happened today and it made me very upset. I got over it quickly when I thought about someone else in particular who wasn't in such a good circumstance.

    Thank you for this and thank you for your comment on my magazine.

    I hope you keep stopping by me.

  11. Thanks for shedding some light on a very important topic, darling!


  12. i certainly know what it's like to feel bitter and do everything in my power to avoid it. really, being bitter is an ugly trait and i would hate to be known by anyone for having it.
    xoxo alison

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Thank you for your time. I'll get back to you soon. :)