Sunday, July 26, 2009

Should you date a colleague?

When you sign a contract with a company, the rules listed in the contract might consist of you not allowed to date a colleague. It is not a rule to every institution, however; there are a number that has a clear policy against dating within colleagues. Thus the question, should you date a colleague? Or why shouldn’t you?

I know, you might be thinking “well, it is not allowed as stated in the contract”. But what if the institution you joined is not prohibiting it, would you still consider it?

Here are some good things in dating a colleague.

1. You get inspired to go to work.

Going to work is no longer boring with too many stuff to do. It ceases to be a routine. You start to feel good and to always look forward to go to work. The eight hours just fly too fast and you would not mind working overtime.

2. You start to be particular on how you look.

Okay, we always make sure that we go to work well dressed, but if you date a colleague, you go beyond the simple following the dress code to putting more effort on being attractive. Hectic schedules and business does not stop you to always get a second to check in the mirror if you still have your hair in place, your tie fixed or your lipstick gone.

3. You get the drive to achieve more.

You’ll work harder to achieve more to impress the person you’re dating. You just want to show that you’ll make a perfect mate.

4. You feel that you always have an ally.

Yes, it feels good thinking that whatever happens, you’ll always have someone you can rely on within your institution or perhaps someone who can defend and protect you against any political issues that would arise [if any].

5. You are certain to find a lot of common things from each other.

It isn’t hard to find commonalities or you wouldn’t be working in the same field. And isn’t that the reason why an affair usually happens at work? Where people meet intellectually with the same interests?

However, if the dating or an affair does not turn out well, there are some good reasons you’ll find why you shouldn’t have dated a colleague in the first place.

1. Even if he’s/she’s the last person you want to see, you’ll have to stand seeing him/her everyday.

This is the sad part because in letting go, not seeing the person who broke your heart helps out the process. But if the person is a colleague, then you would have to endure that. You would have to maintain professionalism despite the broken heart.

2. If you’re the one who got dumped, the other party has a big tendency to prove to you that he/she made the right decision. That’s the biggest slap in the face. And the worst part is that he/she has all the opportunities to do it in your face.

Do I have to say more for this? Oh, it’s totally awful. But I tell what? Even if you’re initial reaction is hate the person, in the end, you will have to thank him/her for doing so. Not only has he proved that he does not deserve to have you but that had he not left you, you would not get an opportunity to find someone’s better. So go, say “thank you!”

3. Friends are put in an awkward position.

Friends wouldn’t know how to act around the two of you. They might be forced to divide or be left tagged in the middle. It simply is a break down of a good circle.

1 comment:

  1. Very well said and written.
    This is all true as long as the boundaries are not crossed in the workplace.

    But once they are..unfortunately no matter how many times we read and agree with rules...when matters of the heart take control and cupid's arrow is aiming right for us...we lose the battle.
    Love is a very strong force or rather the thoughts of love which is what drives our chemical reactions through the roof.
    How many propel are married with a family and then it happens to them. They meet someone against all rules and odds and cannot fight it because when a human is weak...they are totally and open to temptation.
    Being human is a weakness as we were not born perfect.
    There are very few people that can hold onto a discipline and stick by the rules when love strikes.


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